#1 I slept in until 10:19 am. This is the only time I have slept in this summer. I then chose to not come downstairs until 2 pm. Don't get me wrong, I was doing stuff. I drank my coffee that my wonderful Paul brought up to me, and laid with the baby during his nap watching HGTV. The thing this taught me was that I need to do it again. =)
#2 After I got out and started weeding and fertilizing my lawn and flowers, Abby complained that she was bored, but no, she couldn't help me (naturally). I asked her to get on her bike and start practicing her riding. Now, she is a TOP student, dancer, and great at many, many things, but she is nearly 8 1/2 and can't (won't) ride her bike. I have been helping her for nearly 3 years...today I was tired of the cheering, polite prodding, and sensitive crap and told her to just get going. Actually, after about 45 min. of sweating, supporting her butt, and cajoling, I told her to learn how to do this thing or she couldn't go in the house tonight. I'm embarrassed to say that I said that, and I know it wouldn't have been something I carried through, but five minutes later........SHE RODE ALL THE WAY DOWN THE STREET AND BACK!!!!!!!!!! With absolutely no reservation, I screamed and whooped it up all the way out to her!!
Because I want to finish my yard tonight, I went back to weeding. Several minutes later, Abby walks over to me and stated, "Mom, sometimes you just have to stop cheering me on and kick my butt. Good job!"
I am so proud!
Now off to the backyard again. The weeds are waiting!
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
32?
It feels like nothin to me. Just like when I was 31. And 28. Another day onward. I have never understood the question, "How does it feel to be another year older?"
How do you answer that?? More importantly, why would you bother to ask it???
I read this book, Water for Elephants, the other day. It made me think about getting old. Not older, no, OLD. I quickly quit that--I already miss that giddy feeling of childhood.
I quite like 32. I feel better than I did at 22, and I can confidently discern between who and what I choose or not. That feels freeing, mostly. Raising kids is wonderful. Working towards goals fulfills me. I hope this year continues to be a positive one!
How do you answer that?? More importantly, why would you bother to ask it???
I read this book, Water for Elephants, the other day. It made me think about getting old. Not older, no, OLD. I quickly quit that--I already miss that giddy feeling of childhood.
I quite like 32. I feel better than I did at 22, and I can confidently discern between who and what I choose or not. That feels freeing, mostly. Raising kids is wonderful. Working towards goals fulfills me. I hope this year continues to be a positive one!
Sunday, July 12, 2009
An Interesting Kind of Week
This week began in an unsettling kind of way (read previous post for a small slice of insight), and ended very differently.
I taught at SWC (at State) for the first time and just loved it. I was incredibly nervous to start, but was so blessed with 10 hardworking, dynamic students and it just got better from there. Pure joy was ever-present in our little group! My kids were from Clare and Williamston and Korea and Taiwan, Ionia, Grand Ledge, and more. We traveled all over campus, discovered much about bugs and flowers and ourselves, fed ducks, ate ice cream at the Dairy Store, and had so much fun! Oh, and we wrote and wrote and wrote and published ourselves. I really cherish that experience. It is my element.
When I got home from the last day of this week's camp, my sister and her family were at my house. I was expecting this, but I didn't expect was the total recalibration of me that occurred during this long weekend. We did nothing dramatic--chatted a whole lot, roasted marshmallows, made good food, and had a couple of small family/friend reunions. Yet, as I sit here tonight I have made a revelation. Through talking to my female relatives--grandmas, sister, nieces, etc.--I am owned. I live approx. 642 miles from my mother and sister and nieces. Much of that distance is closed through phone, facebook, and email, but physical proximity matters. You can't replace the energy created when two people are in a room, except when they are together.
Sitting, cooking, and chatting over "nothing at all" with so many relatives who have been there my whole life was COMFORT. I didn't worry about saying the right thing or being a role model or acceptance for four straight days. I like that. Very settling, indeed. I am going to take this weekend as a birthday present. It is of the very best kind!
I taught at SWC (at State) for the first time and just loved it. I was incredibly nervous to start, but was so blessed with 10 hardworking, dynamic students and it just got better from there. Pure joy was ever-present in our little group! My kids were from Clare and Williamston and Korea and Taiwan, Ionia, Grand Ledge, and more. We traveled all over campus, discovered much about bugs and flowers and ourselves, fed ducks, ate ice cream at the Dairy Store, and had so much fun! Oh, and we wrote and wrote and wrote and published ourselves. I really cherish that experience. It is my element.
When I got home from the last day of this week's camp, my sister and her family were at my house. I was expecting this, but I didn't expect was the total recalibration of me that occurred during this long weekend. We did nothing dramatic--chatted a whole lot, roasted marshmallows, made good food, and had a couple of small family/friend reunions. Yet, as I sit here tonight I have made a revelation. Through talking to my female relatives--grandmas, sister, nieces, etc.--I am owned. I live approx. 642 miles from my mother and sister and nieces. Much of that distance is closed through phone, facebook, and email, but physical proximity matters. You can't replace the energy created when two people are in a room, except when they are together.
Sitting, cooking, and chatting over "nothing at all" with so many relatives who have been there my whole life was COMFORT. I didn't worry about saying the right thing or being a role model or acceptance for four straight days. I like that. Very settling, indeed. I am going to take this weekend as a birthday present. It is of the very best kind!
Monday, July 6, 2009
Unsettled?
Over the summer, I have noticed something about me. I am not content to just sit and do "nothing" for long stretches of time. The good thing is, I have three little kids who rarely allow for that.
The challenge is, sometimes I feel like I can't complete something I love/need to do--read a book, sew covers for our downstairs benches, do crafts, organize the basement, paint my room, or write BECAUSE I need to attend to everyone else's needs. It is a lot like running in a hamster cage.
I am unsettled. There I said it.
Now I will go do something for myself.
PS. If anyone out there wants to do a writing marathon with me next week, let me know. I would like that very much. =)
The challenge is, sometimes I feel like I can't complete something I love/need to do--read a book, sew covers for our downstairs benches, do crafts, organize the basement, paint my room, or write BECAUSE I need to attend to everyone else's needs. It is a lot like running in a hamster cage.
I am unsettled. There I said it.
Now I will go do something for myself.
PS. If anyone out there wants to do a writing marathon with me next week, let me know. I would like that very much. =)
Saturday, July 4, 2009
The 4th of July
Last night, Paul and I went to the Daily Grill in Ada for the first time. For those of you that haven't been there, it is right next to the Mud Room and I recommend it for the quiet, peaceful ambiance and the outdoor deck that overlooks the Thornapple and the gardens they grow their produce in. We also watched the movie Away We Go. Unlike the Kid Rock concert we are about to go to, or the water balloon fight we are going to attend at Rosa Parks Circle today, the night was calm, quiet and reflective.
Because it is our anniversary, naturally I started thinking about our 11 years of marriage. We have been through some serious stuff. We have bought two houses, had three kids, had to put down our family dog, watched my parents move 650 miles away, completed a Flint internship, graduated from several things, lost our nephew, a dear friend and some grandparents. We have learned to endure and be patient (two long stints with bedrest and unpredictability...). We have settled into a little bit of a life rhythm too. The phrase, "it's always SOMETHING," sums up my life for sure!
While I certainly could not put on an internet blog all of the struggles and fun we have had together, it is certainly important to know that we have had A LOT of fun!! Simple things like taking the kids to somewhere none of us has been, and experiencing it together are my favorite. It doesn't have to be a pirate ship ride or an American Girl outing(though how incredible, right?). Watching Adam or Abby on stage, TV, or in our backyard usually just cracks me up! I laugh so hard at them--which is mostly why I am awful at posting pics/ writing down memories/etc.--I'm just having too much damn fun living it! Sweet little Charley is a whole other realm of interest. He is my little cling-on, so happy and carefree. It is insanely funny how parents treat "the baby". With the other 2, we would rub their backs in their bed and wait a minute for them to go back to bed. Charley has the innate ability to push Paul out of bed. At least once a week, Paul will wake up on the couch. No complaints, just the way it is....and if he wants ice cream at 7:30 am, I have been known to oblige without thinking. Moms don't have favorite kids, but I am not sure why the rules have been so lax with him...
My point is this. In the 17 years we have been together, there have been days that Paul pushes me to my breaking point. If you are reading this, you undoubtedly know about some of those times that he has taken on "turd" status in my eyes. Yet, it all works for us. We don't have it all together--you can't have two full time jobs, three kids, and two dogs and do that. But we try everyday. So, if you want to know how I am spending my anniversary...we are leaving the messy house for an afternoon and evening, participating in a community waterballoon fight, and watching the fireworks in GR. I am sure we will chalk up a sidewalk somewhere. Adam will be too loud. Abby will dance to the music, and cry at that Lee Greenwood song with me. I hope Charley sings "Halleluia" everytime a firework goes up (like he did in Ionia), and just like always, I will sit by Paul and quietly relish all that we have together.
Because it is our anniversary, naturally I started thinking about our 11 years of marriage. We have been through some serious stuff. We have bought two houses, had three kids, had to put down our family dog, watched my parents move 650 miles away, completed a Flint internship, graduated from several things, lost our nephew, a dear friend and some grandparents. We have learned to endure and be patient (two long stints with bedrest and unpredictability...). We have settled into a little bit of a life rhythm too. The phrase, "it's always SOMETHING," sums up my life for sure!
While I certainly could not put on an internet blog all of the struggles and fun we have had together, it is certainly important to know that we have had A LOT of fun!! Simple things like taking the kids to somewhere none of us has been, and experiencing it together are my favorite. It doesn't have to be a pirate ship ride or an American Girl outing(though how incredible, right?). Watching Adam or Abby on stage, TV, or in our backyard usually just cracks me up! I laugh so hard at them--which is mostly why I am awful at posting pics/ writing down memories/etc.--I'm just having too much damn fun living it! Sweet little Charley is a whole other realm of interest. He is my little cling-on, so happy and carefree. It is insanely funny how parents treat "the baby". With the other 2, we would rub their backs in their bed and wait a minute for them to go back to bed. Charley has the innate ability to push Paul out of bed. At least once a week, Paul will wake up on the couch. No complaints, just the way it is....and if he wants ice cream at 7:30 am, I have been known to oblige without thinking. Moms don't have favorite kids, but I am not sure why the rules have been so lax with him...
My point is this. In the 17 years we have been together, there have been days that Paul pushes me to my breaking point. If you are reading this, you undoubtedly know about some of those times that he has taken on "turd" status in my eyes. Yet, it all works for us. We don't have it all together--you can't have two full time jobs, three kids, and two dogs and do that. But we try everyday. So, if you want to know how I am spending my anniversary...we are leaving the messy house for an afternoon and evening, participating in a community waterballoon fight, and watching the fireworks in GR. I am sure we will chalk up a sidewalk somewhere. Adam will be too loud. Abby will dance to the music, and cry at that Lee Greenwood song with me. I hope Charley sings "Halleluia" everytime a firework goes up (like he did in Ionia), and just like always, I will sit by Paul and quietly relish all that we have together.
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